Grandparents' houses are wonderful. They're also, from a baby safety perspective, kind of terrifying.
Low coffee tables with sharp corners. Medications on the nightstand. Cleaning supplies under the kitchen sink without locks. Stairs with no gate. Decorative objects everywhere. It's like a museum where everything is at grabbing height.
And you can't exactly walk in and announce that their home is a death trap. That conversation goes badly 100% of the time.
The Diplomacy Approach
Start by framing it as a team effort, not a critique. "Hey, can we baby-proof a few things before the visit? I'll bring everything we need." Works way better than "Your house is dangerous."
Most grandparents want to help. They just haven't thought about baby safety in 30 years. The standards have changed. When they raised you, cribs had drop sides, babies slept on their stomachs, and nobody used outlet covers. They're not being careless — they're working from outdated information.
Bring a small baby-proofing kit with you. Here's what to pack:
All of this fits in a gallon zip-lock bag and costs under $40.
The big Three to Check
Medications: This is the number one hazard at grandparents' houses. Older adults take more medications, and they often keep them on counters, nightstands, and in purses. A single blood pressure pill can be fatal to a toddler. Ask grandparents to move all medications to a high shelf or locked cabinet before you arrive.
Cleaning supplies: Same deal as at your own house, but grandparents might have older, more concentrated products. Bleach, drain cleaner, oven cleaner — these need to be out of reach or locked up.
Small objects: Coins in a dish on the counter. Buttons in a sewing kit. Batteries in a junk drawer. Grandparents' houses tend to accumulate small objects in accessible places. Do a quick sweep of rooms your baby will be in.
Furniture and Layout
Grandparents often have furniture that hasn't moved in 20 years. Heavy items on high shelves, glass-top tables, rocking chairs (pinch hazard for small fingers), and area rugs that bunch and cause trips.
You can't rearrange their entire house, but you can move a few things temporarily. Shift the rocking chair into a room you'll keep closed. Move the glass candy dish to a high shelf. Roll up the small throw rug in the hallway.
Sleep Setup
This is where it gets sensitive. Grandparents sometimes have old cribs in the attic — the kind with drop sides that have been recalled. Don't use them. Bring a portable travel crib or pack-n-play.
Skip the extra blankets, pillows, and stuffed animals that grandma might pile into the sleep space. Current safe sleep guidelines say a firm mattress with a fitted sheet and nothing else. Share the guidelines gently if needed.
Making it a Positive Thing
Thank grandparents for being flexible. Acknowledge that this stuff didn't exist when they were raising kids. And give them agency — let them help install the outlet covers or set up the gate.
Most importantly, don't leave your baby unsupervised at grandparents' house just because "they raised you and you turned out fine." Survivorship bias isn't a safety plan.
Visits to grandparents should be fun, not stressful. A little prep goes a long way.